Hosiery, stockings, nylons.....whatever

One of my earlier posts reminded me how much I dislike nylon stockings (aka hosiery). Yes - I know - there is nothing more polished than a sheer black stockinged leg partnered with a hounds tooth pattern or short grey textured wool skirt. I will even admit there are some really fetching patterned stockings that lend a completely new dimension to an ensemble. However, stockings (nylons, hosiery or whatever you call them) are high on my list of essential fashion items that I absolutely hate spending money on.

Why? First of all, I find them incredibly difficult to shop for - especially if you are doing the crisis dash to the chemist (drug store) following a “wardrobe malfunction”.
How in the world do you decide between say a pair of Voodoo Shine Sheer to Waist, Platinum Sheen Sheers, Kaiser Sheers or any of the vast array of brands you find in the supermarket, or high end department stores? Does price really guarantee quality or are we all really being sold the packaging? Why would you spend say $150 on a pair of Wolford’s?

Am I the only one who finds descriptors such as “all day support” or “sheer to
waist” incredibly confusing? What in the world is a gusset or a reinforced toe? Is it me or is someone suggesting women need to enter the workplace with some kind of additional protective armour? If we have really to wear these things why in the world has no-one created a good “nude” stocking without the peach fuzz and that actually looks nude?

And while I am appreciative of those funny looking dangling samplers - how can I really tell difference between “midnight black”and “ebony” what colour is “jabou”? And why is it I can never find a sample that actually matches the stocking I want to purchase?


And lastly, can someone please explain to me why I am paying ridiculous sums of money for a fashion item I am likely to only wear once? Well, watch this space because I am going to road test a few of these babies and let me assure you this is one race where the fastest runners are the biggest losers....